being silly at the Ball taking a selfie

What do you think of when you hear the word “submission”?  I’m not talking about ‘shades of grey’ submission, either!  😉  Do you think of a doormat?  Or maybe a woman who doesn’t get to have her own identity?  Or do you possibly think of freedom?

Maybe I should ask, “what do you think when others talk about biblical submission for a wife?”.

See, I struggle with that.  I am pretty sure I come across to friends and family as a submissive wife, but it is not without a struggle in my heart and mind.  And sometimes I don’t bite my tongue when I should and say something stupid resulting in a petty disagreement between hubby and myself.

How do you be submissive to your husband as God directs us without losing your own identity?  How does one find balance between “homemaker” and “modern woman”?  Thankfully my hubby is a great, God-fearing man who tries his best to love and cherish his wife (me!) and that sure makes it a lot easier to be submissive to his leadership in our family.  He loves me and who I am; he supports my hobbies and dreams.

You know how hard it can sometimes be not to nag!  *giggle* You know us women can run things well – especially us military wives!  I think being a military wife can make it harder to be submissive.  We are so used to doing everything ourselves and during a long deployment you have gotten into a groove and a way of doing things.  Hero hubby comes home and he has his own (ie: different) way of doing things!  A choice has to be made: we can work together or butt heads!

For me, the hardest part of being submissive is knowing when to give my “wifey intuition” or just keep my mouth shut.

Freedom.  How does one gain freedom by being submissive anyhow?  My husband is the head of our household.  He answers to God for his obedience.  I answer to God, yes, but also I answer to my husband.  I can have my say when we are making big decisions for our family; but ultimately it is my husband who makes the decisions.  I am called to be submissive in those decisions, supporting whatever he thinks is best for us – after talking & praying about it as a couple, of course.  For me, that is freedom.  Sometimes that is hard to wrap my mind around.  🙂  And I’ll be honest… it doesn’t mean I don’t stress during those times of making BIG decisions!

I have recently read Sara Horn’s two books:  ‘My So-Called Life as a Proverbs 31 Wife‘ and ‘My So-Called Life as a Submissive Wife’.  Both had me laughing and crying as she shares her heart during these experiments!   Another great book about submission that I have been blessed by is ‘Created to be His Helpmeet‘ by Debi Pearl.  I know that last book can cause some ladies to cringe; but I love how she boldly writes – sometimes I need that kick in the pants!  I love how God uses these ladies to speak truth into our hearts.  If you check out these books, let me know what you think!

I would love to chat with you on facebook or twitter  ~ or follow me on pinterest!

Blessings ~


5 thoughts on “Submission

  1. After my studies, I am much more comfortable with the idea of submission. However, I find it important to understand that submission goes both ways. Mutual submission heals the natural faults we tend to fall into in a relationship… such as nagging and wanting things our own way. Have you read, When Life and Beliefs Collide by Carolyn Custis James, or Two Views on Women in Ministry? I recommend both of them.

  2. Great post. One thing most women don’t realize about leadership/submission is that not only do our husbands have to answer for themselves as head of house, but they have to answer to God for us as well.

    If we look at the fall account in Genesis, we know that Eve sinned first, however God calls out to Adam first, asking him “Where are you? God held the man primarily responsible for the fall. Same for our husbands, if we are not walking in obedience to the Lord (via submission to our husbands), as the leader, our husbands will be held accountable for our sin.

    Ouch, that hurts to think that I am heaping extra judgment on my husband when I fail to be obedient/submissive.

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